Eddie Izzard

I’ve been a fan of comedian/actor Eddie Izzard for about 5 or 6 years. While I don’t remember exactly how I found out about him, I do remember seeing his HBO comedy special “Dress to Kill” and feeling that a lot of his funny-but-true observations resonated with me. I was transfixed by his ability to successfully fuse together topics like history, politics, religion, and pop culture and still make them unbelievably funny. Audiences are treated to a wild and interesting ride through his imagination and it’s incredibly entertaining.

I attended both of his Toronto shows at the end of May (hey, you only live once, right?) I’m happy to report that he seems to be back in girly-mode. That’s the version of Eddie Izzard I became a fan of and I think I’m more used to it than his boy-mode. Here are a few of my favorite Izzbits from the show:

• Izzard says he believes Noah (from the Bible) existed, built a boat, but he didn’t really put two of each and every animal on the ark. “How do I know that? YOU try it.”

• Giraffes can only show two emotions: fear and surprise. They have no other method of signaling other than to cough to other giraffes, an ancient British method, according to Izzard. Initially, the other giraffes have no idea what the main giraffe is trying to communicate to them. The bit then transforms into a semi-elaborate game of charades between the two parties (which is the point in the bit where I begin giggling uncontrollably.)

• The Darwin-Dickens connection - Charles Darwin, of course, who wrote “Great Expectations” the classic tale about an amoeba named Pip. Darwin lived one vowel over from Dickens. He later wrote his famous book on evolution, the original title of which was “Monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey, monkey, you.”

• Izzard treats his audience to a musical medley (at some points, the show began to resemble a mini-cabaret act.) He takes us through the Spartan battle of Thermopylae fought by child-star Shirley Temple who is killing her opponents while singing “On the Good Ship Lollipop” (Izzard erroneously refers to “On the Good Ship Lollipop” as a Temple film: it was actually a song from her 1934 film “Bright Eyes”) When discussing fish, “if you look in their eyes, fish have no ambition.” He begins singing “ambitiooooooooooon” to the tune of “Tradition” from the musical “Fiddler on the Roof.” Later when the fish somehow land up in a bird’s nest, he mimes a dance between the fish and the birds a la the Jets and the Sharks from West Side Story.

• Throughout the show, Izzard weaves his somewhat new-found belief in atheism. If God exists, he argues, the one place he should have showed up was the moon landing. Cut to Izzard miming Neil Armstrong et al showing up on the moon. God shows up “Heeeeeeeeeey, you made it!! Neil, hi, I’m God. Buzz! Are you Buzz Lightyear? I’ve been living here on the dark side of the moon with Pink Floyd and Darth Vader.” Izzard breathes into the microphone in a Darth Vader-esque fashion, but of course, on an Izzardian twist, that turns out to be Pink Floyd. Darth Vader, without his mask, sounds more like a woman with a weird voice.

• Though I can’t remember how he got onto the topic, Izzard discusses silent sheep. They prey upon sleeping wolves, who think that it’s their birthday because there are all these sheep and they’re hungry. The sheep shear themselves in front of the wolves, just to show no fear.

As I mentioned at the outset, I’ve been a fan of Eddie Izzard for several years. Yet the Toronto shows were the first time I’d seen him live. Needless to say, he does not disappoint and the two shows are now a highlight of my 2010 so far.

June 27 SLASH!!!!!!!!!!!!

That's all I really need to say to explain this unscheduled stop. Slash. Oh yes! While I was in St. Louis, I found out that Slash would be making an appearance at the first annual Sunset Strip Music Festival. He would be the special guest of B-Real and Sen Dog of Cyprus Hill. I don't like rap or hip-hop, but I was willing to sit through it to see Slash.

Appetite For Destruction, the debut album from Guns N Roses, was the soundtrack to my life when I was in the 9th grade. It's not that I identified with the "sex drugs and rock and roll" that the songs talked about. But that album was a great outlet for the teen frustration I felt on a daily basis. So to be able to finally see Slash in person, in the flesh was a huge deal for me.

Before he came on the stage, my friend Laurie and I had to sit through FOUR hours of music that under normal circumstances we would never voluntary listen to. There were three reggae bands. Ugh! The lead singer of one of the bands was what I would call "homeless chic." He was white with unwashed dreadlocks and just looked very smelly. Then another reggae band did a REGGAE cover of The Doors' "Light My Fire." I think I heard Jim Morrison sit up in his grave and plug his ears.

That being said, it was WORTH sitting through all that garbage to get to see Slash. Very early on in the evening, I staked out my position in front of the stage and I did NOT move for four hours (a major accomplishment considering how much water I drink and how often I have to pee!) When Slash finally did come out just after midnight, he played guitar right over me. Here are a few pictures to show just how close I really was!

June 26 Wildfires

I drove through Mendocino County today where they're experiencing bad wildfires. The visibility's really bad; I can only see about a mile or two in the distance. The sun is out, I can tell, but I can't actually see it due to the dense smoke. I'm coughing a lot but I'm not sure if it's because I'm getting over a slight cold or because of the wildfires. I suspect the latter.

I lost a half hour in my travels today. There was state park where you could see elk, so I drove up and down this windy path. I did not see ONE elk. If the state park promises elk, they need to deliver. Tie one to a tree, stuff an already-dead elk, I don't care!! I WANTED TO SEE AN ELK!! *flounce* (I'm not suggesting animal cruelty. I'm just miffed that I didn't get to see an elk when the sign said something about elk sightings.)

June 25 Redwood Forest

When I was about 9 or 10 years old, I remember reading an article that said that the seed of the sequoia tree was the size of the point of a pencil. Yet some varieties of the sequoia grow so large that if the tree is tunneled out, you can drive your car through it. That amazed me and I've always wanted to see the trees for myself. This summer, I finally got to!!!



It was truly awesome to come out of the Redwood Forest and see the Pacific Ocean right there! I couldn't help humming "this land is your land" a bit.



I stayed at the Redwood Hostel. The second story bedroom window overlooks the ocean. Pretty nice for just $20 a night! I couldn't get the thought out of my head that there was something so familiar about the Redwood Forest. While I was staying there, the desk clerk said that the Ewok scenes from Return of the Jedi had been filmed in nearby Jedediah Smith State Park! Aha!! That's it!!! Without knowing it, my mind was replaying the chase scene with Luke and Leia on a speeder being pursued by an Imperial Stormtrooper.

June 22-24 en route to California

My next stop was the Redwood Forest in northern California. However, coming from the far northeastern corner of Montana, that was going to take a few days to get there. As I made my way to my overnight stop in Bozeman, Montana, I caught a glimpse of the northern range of the Rocky Mountains.


The next two days were spent driving through Oregon. I was surprised to see such a varying landscape. When I think "Oregon", I think "rain" so it must be lush and green throughout the entire state, right? Wrong.

Lush and green...


Hilly and desert-y...

watery wilderness. The road this lake was on had NO houses or business for the entire 30 miles stretch. It was strange and yet calming to see nothing but animals on this river...


I got carsick while driving down OR-66. It was a curvy road on a downward spiral for about 25 miles. That's the only time in my life I've ever been carsick while I was driving. Eurgh, even thinking about it makes me feel queasy. I'll never drive down that road again.

June 10-22 Plentywood, Montana

I spent the next 12 days with my sister in the small town in Montana. It's very close to the Canadian border so from De Smet, it took me about 10 hours to drive there. I didn't really do a whole lot in Montana. My sister has a smaller version of Blockbuster Video in her house with all the movies she has. So on days when she was at work, I'd watch TV. I seem to remember going through the Harry Potter movies at least twice while I was there. On days my she was off work, we'd hang out and watch TV together.

It was really great connecting with my sister. It's so odd that we never connected before now. She's ten years older than I am, so by the time I reached the age where I could really start being a sister and not just an annoying kid in the house, she had moved out, had a baby, and started an adult life. As I got older she was preoccupied with the life of a housewife so we didn't really connect then either. I didn't realize until this visit how similar she and I really are. All these years I felt like I didn't identify with my family. As it turns out we're more alike than I knew.

Toward the end of my visit with her, my sister took me driving and I got some beautiful pictures of the Montana landscape. This sounds silly to say, but the sky looks so big in Montana. Of course the sky is the same size no matter where you are. But in Montana where the plains are flat and there aren't oversized trees blocking your view, you really get a feel of how large and beautiful the sky really is.






I should also mention that we goofed around a bit too. That was fun. Sorry, Veronica, for posting this picture but it's funny and needs to be seen!

June 9 De Smet South Dakota, part 2

Today I went into town to see the rest of the Ingalls sites in De Smet. In 1893, Pa built a house in town that was closer to the school Carrie and Grace attended. I don't have any documented proof for what I'm about to say, but I'm sure as Charles Ingalls got older, it wasn't as easy to farm so the move likely benefited him as well.

You enter the gift shop of the Laura Ingalls Wilder Memorial Society (LIWMS) where you're greeted by a tour guide. I was the only one there, so she said she'd take me on the tour with just the two of us. I mentioned what a big fan I was of the Little House books and how being in De Smet was a real dream come true for me. The tour guide good-naturedly tried to stump me with various "little-known" facts. After several failed attempts, she was finally able to stump me with something about Almanzo which I can't even remember now. :D Ha! I got the last laugh lol.

LIWMS also offers the viewing of a replica of the Brewster school (from These Happy Golden Years) where Laura fulfilled her very first teaching assignment. The actual school was some 12 miles from De Smet, but the current location of the school serves it purpose.



My tour guide then toook me over to the Ingalls house on 3rd street. Taking interior pictures is not allowed, so if you want to see pics, google them. From one of the 2nd story bedroom windows, however, I was able to see something VERY historically important. I cannot remember the denomination of the church now, but Charles Ingalls helped to build the church in the picture below (ignore the cars and the paddling pool.)